Threesomes can be a bit of juggling. I think so. “Are the guests at ease?” Who are they eyeing? Who am I looking at?
Felix and I had sex the first afternoon we met, and I remember him making a big fuss. I have an office upstairs in my apartment and the walls are very thin. I was in the middle of a particularly intimate moment, and I vividly remember hearing the phone ringing upstairs in the commotion Felix was actually making. It suddenly became clear that if we could hear that call, everyone in the office could hear us. I tried to quiet Felix a bit, but his lack of restraint was refreshing.
We met on Grindr, and some of the other guys I slept with through the app were insecure about their homosexuality. I live in Spain and although being gay is not necessarily dangerous, life still revolves around the church. I’ve met guys who want to turn off the lights during sex, keep their shirts on, and beg to be treated like dirt. Felix was very different, he was a cheerful and cheerful person. He didn’t just say hello and take off his pants, he wanted us to eat lunch.
I’m on top with Felix, which means I’m the active partner, but Felix is on the bottom. But in reality, Felix is much more versatile. It’s just that he’s forced to stick to a passive role towards me because I can’t physically handle being the lowest. It’s anatomical. Mentally I want to, but physically it just doesn’t work out. Felix and I agreed that it was unfair not to be able to satisfy him in that way, so we decided to open our relationship. We’ve been dating for two years, but every few weeks each of us goes out separately or sleeps with a different man. We also like meeting men and having threesomes.
Threesomes are sexy, but they require a surprising amount of preparation. We chat with candidates online, but Felix handles most of the texting because he’s a lot better at flirting than I am. The threesome itself can be a bit of a juggling act. You wonder, “Are my guests safe?” Who are they looking at? Who am I looking at? It’s like hitting your head and rubbing your stomach at the same time. But I think we’re getting better at them. 3P also he thinks it’s a learning curve as well as 2P.
After my initial excitement with another man wears off, I usually end up missing Lorenzo.
My sexual energy is very high and can be a little too much for Lorenzo. For example, if we were in the kitchen, I would be right behind him at the sink and want to hug, touch, and grab his butt. I don’t think he likes it. He shows his love in other ways. It’s an act of kindness and how carefully you listen. He’s not as sexual as I am. That’s part of the reason we decided to sleep with other people.
We are constantly updating our terms and conditions, and part of that contract is to report back to each other on all the men we have had sex with. I show him pictures of men I’ve been home with, especially cute ones, and talk to them about their best behavior. Lorenzo and I have always been honest about our sexual compatibility. Lorenzo is on top, but I like to switch roles. He couldn’t give me everything I needed, so early on he decided it wasn’t fair to me and insisted we should both be free.
Sometimes I sleep with a particularly attractive man and then arrange a date where I take him home and have a threesome. The problem is that we rarely agree on who is attractive and who is not. Lorenzo showed me men he’d liked in the past and I was like, “Wow.” I like curly men who look young. It’s not his type, but we compromise in turn.
We have strict rules when it comes to falling in love. We are not allowed to have feelings for others. It was never a problem for me. After my initial excitement with another man wears off, I usually miss Lorenzo. I am disappointed in the way this stranger kisses and the feel of his tongue in my mouth. Smelling his crappy aftershave reminds me of the very distinct and fresh scent of Lorenzo’s skin. Every time I sleep with another man, I love Lorenzo a little more.
Would you and your partner want to share your sex life story anonymously?